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My husband and I are currently listening to a series called Love & Respect and its been a game-changer for us. He shares about how women just need to be/feel loved and men need respect and if neither needs are met a vicious cycle ensues.
Its been 8 years of marriage and I finally just learned the secret to not just a mediocre marriage, but a great one. Do you want to know too? 
Everything you say or do unto your spouse you do unto Him. So when your in the middle of a spat and tempted to stonewall or say things in anger, remember you do it unto Him. I thought, really? But yes its true if we do everything for the glory of God and to please Him then it makes perfect sense that how we treat our spouse matters to God. This was heavy and convicting for me friends to say the least. 
Here's to going deeper in our marriages and remembering whatever we do, we do unto Him. 
Bring on the life change.